Reception Management: A Look At The Typical Wedding Reception

Since 1981, my wife and I have planned literally thousands of wedding receptions with our clients. One thing that we have learned is that there are numerous ways in which to organize a wedding reception. The old days of managing a wedding based on the book of etiquette have faded away. In the last ten years, brides and grooms have decided that the suggestions in the book of etiquette were too rigid and that they didn’t take into account the specific circumstances of each wedding or the bride’s and the groom’s personalities and personal preferences. Fortunately, brides and grooms today tend to organize and manage their wedding to suit their needs.Let’s take a look at the “typical” reception. Keep in mind that the suggestions we offer here are only guidelines. The sequence of events at a wedding varies from one client to the next, and also varies from one part of the country to another. As an entertainer, it is your job to plan with each client exactly what reception formalities will take place, and what sequence they will follow, regardless of what part of the country you are from. This provides your clients with the personalized service they deserve.

Once the bride and groom have exchanged vows and rings, and the ceremony is complete, the guests who attended the wedding ceremony usually drive to the reception. Normally, the bride, groom, and wedding party will stay behind for photographs. The DJ will start background music as the guests arrive, help themselves to hors d’oeuvres, and begin to socialize.

Most of the receptions that we perform include the Bridal Party Introduction. When this happens, the entire wedding party and any parents are usually announced, although occasionally this is scaled back to introducing just the bride and groom. If you take your duties as an Emcee seriously, you should take charge of lining up the wedding party for the introductions. This is a perfect opportunity to break the ice with the wedding party, and let them know that you are there to provide fun for everyone. It is also a good opportunity to double-check the pronunciation of the names of the wedding party as you line them up. It’s a good idea to keep anyone that is to be introduced from going into the reception area. Otherwise, it will take longer to get the introductions underway, if you have to go back into the reception area and round up the wedding party and parents.

After the bridal party has been introduced, the bride and groom may opt to have a receiving line. In recent years, receiving lines have become less popular than they used to be in the 70/80′s. One popular option to a formal receiving line is to allow 20 to 30 minutes after the Wedding Party Introduction for the bride and groom to mingle with their guests, and use this opportunity to thank them for coming. This option is attractive because it doesn’t force their guests to stand in a long line.

Prior to the buffet/sit down dinner, it is customary for a blessing to be performed. If there is a blessing on the agenda, you will need to identify the person to perform this in advance, so they are not taken by surprised when they are called upon to perform this task!

The toast may be done just after the blessing, prior to the meal being served. Equally as often, the toast is done with the cake cutting after the meal. The decision on this depends greatly on personal preferences. The more formal the wedding, the more often the toast is done prior to the meal, especially when a sit down dinner is served.

Whenever you decide to include the toast, the Best Man is usually the first person to offer the toast to the bride and groom. The Best Man’s toast is sometimes followed by the father of the bride, who can propose a toast for the bride’s family. Then, the groom’s father might follow. This depends greatly on the personal preferences of the bride’s and/or groom’s father.

The music during dinner is normally light background music. However, it is not uncommon for a bride to request that you play up-tempo oldies that will get people beginning to tap their toes!

You should be paying close attention to the flow of dinner, and make suggestions on when to move on to the next formal event of the reception. An experienced Emcee/DJ will know when the time is right to move on to the next event (usually the cake cutting). Pay attention to what people are doing. Have the guests started to mill around the reception, visiting with other guests? Have you noticed an unmistakable elevation in the conversation level of all of the guests? If so, this usually means that people have finished eating, and are now talking! This is your cue to ask the bride and groom if they are ready for the next scheduled event.

This brings up a good question. Should you set a time schedule for all of the reception formalities? I am not particularly fond of setting a time schedule. Why? First of all, time schedules almost never work. While they can be used as a guideline, one little glitch throws the entire schedule off track. An experienced Emcee/DJ will be able to assist in making sure the flow of your reception runs smoothly – making sure that the reception doesn’t become boring, as well as ensuring that it isn’t rushed.

If you do not have much experience at managing a wedding reception, perhaps a time schedule is a good idea. As you gain more experience, you will become more familiar on how to space out the reception formalities. Ideally, you will plan what reception formalities the client wants, and what sequence they are to follow prior to the wedding day. However, you will soon find that playing things “by ear” is a more effective method of determining the appropriate TIMING of the reception plan you have established with your client.

The cutting of the wedding cake is one of the big highlights of any wedding reception. We recommend that the bride and groom cut the cake after dinner, just prior to starting the dancing. In the event that you have older people attending the reception, cutting the cake right after dinner allows them to take part in this important tradition prior to them leaving. Some people also like the idea of serving the wedding cake as desert.

It is traditional for the bride and groom to cut the first piece of cake together. The feeding of a piece of cake to each other is usually customary. Often times, the bride and/or groom smash the wedding cake in the other’s face. I have personally witnessed more than one reception where the bride or groom became extremely upset or angry after having the wedding cake smashed in his or her face. This usually occurs after being coaxed by some of the well-intended onlookers. This obviously puts a damper on the rest of the reception. For this reason, I strongly suggest that the Emcee NOT encourage the bride and groom to smash the wedding cake, or make references over the microphone such as “ok, is this going to be a clean one, or a messy one”? Should the bride or groom smash the wedding cake in the other’s face, you could be held responsible for this if you encouraged it.

Ok, the dinner has been served, the cake has been cut, now its time for the fun to begin! Traditionally, the bride and groom share their first dance as husband and wife to lead off the dancing portion of the reception. Occasionally, a bride and groom share their first dance after the introductions, but that doesn’t happen often in our part of the country. I try to steer my clients away from doing their first dance right after introductions. As an entertainer, I want that “big moment” in the first dance to start building momentum on the dance floor. It doesn’t make much sense to me to have the first dance right after introductions, only to mix into background music during dinner. Occasionally, a client will want the dancing to start immediately, because they plan to only have a light buffet that stays open for the duration of the reception. In this event, having the first dance right away isn’t a problem. Either way – work this out with your clients in advance.

Once the bride and groom complete their first dance, a variety of parents and bridal party dances may take place. The bride and her father, the groom and his mother, the wedding party dance, etc, are all options that the client can choose. The dance floor is usually opened up to all of the bride and grooms guests after the parents and bridal party dances have been completed, and this is where things start to liven up!

The amount of interactivity and personality you deliver should be customized with each client prior to the wedding. Do they want you to be fun and interactive, or do they prefer that you use a more “low key” approach? Every bride has her preference, and you should always customize your performances to suit the bride’s tastes. Some brides tell us that they saw a DJ (from another company) at a recent wedding that just sat behind the equipment table and played music. They go on to say that there was little or no interaction to motivate the guests – indicating further that the reception was boring because the DJ didn’t have the ability or initiative to motivate the crowd.

On the other side of the spectrum, a few brides express concern about the DJ going overboard with the interactive approach. So how do you be that fun and interactive Emcee/DJ, without getting carried away? When requested to be fun and interactive, our goal is to strike a compromise between the two extremes we have identified. We will never be the “show-off” type of DJ who stands on chairs, screaming at your guests. Instead, we like to do interactive things that facilitate fun for the guests, and are careful not to take the spotlight away from the most important people that day: the bride and groom. Often times a little interactivity and personality by the Emcee/DJ is all that is necessary to give the guests a little “nudge” to get out of their chairs, and on the dance floor having fun!

The dollar dance is a tradition that is very common in the northern parts of the country. This tradition involves having the ladies line up to dance with the groom, and the gentlemen lining up to dance with the bride. Each person can make a donation of a dollar, five dollars, ten dollars, or whatever they choose to donate. There are several variations of the dollar dance, depending on which part of the country you are from. In one variation, it is only the bride who dances with the guests. One word of caution – dollar dances take time away from open dancing for everyone. During the dollar dance only four people, at most, are dancing at any given time. Often times, when open dancing is stopped to do the dollar dance, it is difficult to get people back on the dance floor at the conclusion of the dollar dance. While this is not always the case, it is a consideration for any bride and groom considering this formality for their reception.

Tradition holds that the person who catches the bouquet may be the next bride. It used to be a foregone conclusion that the bride would toss the bouquet, then the groom would remove the garter from the bride’s leg and toss it to the single gentlemen in the crowd. After that, the guy that caught the garter would place it on the lady that caught the bouquet.

In recent years, brides who prefer to do things that suit their needs and tastes are abandoning a lot of wedding traditions. Often times, the bride will toss the bouquet, but eliminate the garter removal. This is all a matter of personal preferences.

When the bride chooses to toss the bouquet, she usually has a “throw-away” bouquet specifically for this purpose. One word of advice to give any bride tossing a bouquet is to check for low ceilings or overhead obstructions prior to making the toss. Often, a “line drive” toss is necessary when a low ceiling or chandelier is encountered.

A “farewell” dance by the bride and groom is a great way to end the reception on a positive and sentimental note. During the farewell dance, invite the guests to form a circle around the bride and groom to give them a great send-off.

The custom of throwing rice has been replaced with bird seed as the preferred method of giving the bride and groom their final send off of the wedding day. The Emcee usually directs the guests to pick up a packet of birdseed and wait for the bride and groom to exit the reception.

One word of caution on birdseed: More than one bride or groom has been injured by an overzealous guest who throws the birdseed too forcefully. One alternative (that is a bit pricey) is to use rose petals, confetti or bubbles.

As you can see, there are a lot of details that need to be planned, if you want the reception to run smoothly. Planning the reception details of every wedding you perform should be part of the service you offer. If you have good organizational skills, your clients will recognize this and recommend you to their friends.

Making The Sale – Giving Brides Confidence In Your Service

What Do Bride’s Want?Answer: CONFIDENCE IN YOUR ABILITY TO PROVIDE HER THE ENTERTAINMENT SHE HAS ALWAYS DREAMPT OF.

That’s what most brides are looking for. Do you have the ability to perform to a level that provides the bride with the reception that she has always dreamed about? Think about it. This is supposed to be a once-in-a-lifetime event (at least most brides approach the wedding with that idea in mind!). This bride may be spending $6000 to $30,000 on her wedding. Over the years, we have adjusted our marketing approach to give the bride CONFIDENCE in our service that we will provide her with four basic things:

1. PLANNING

2. Music

3. Emcee Service

4. Performance/Interactivity

All of these things combined are an important factor to most brides. Sure, you will find those brides who are looking for the cheapest DJ, and quality isn’t important to them, but I think they are in the minority. I believe that brides come in three categories:

The Cheap Brides
The Average Bride
The Quality Bride – looking for the cheapest DJ, quality not important. – Looking for a DJ who has a reasonable price AND provides a good quality service. IMPORTANT!!! This bride may present herself as the “Cheap Bride” over the phone, because the first question she’ll ask is “how much”? However, if you take the time to talk with her about the wedding, you will find that she is genuinely concerned about the performance of the DJ and quality. – Looking for a DJ who provides outstanding performance and services. Price doesn’t matter.
Obviously, we prefer bride #3, but most often deal with bride #2. It is my belief that there are many more “Average Brides” than “Cheap Brides”. It is your job to focus on the Average Bride, and educate this bride, so that she is willing to pay more than she expected to for the entertainment (assuming that your prices are higher than the bottom feeders in your area). This is why it is important to have good marketing materials and a refined sales pitch over the phone.

We adjusted our entire sales pitch many years ago, to focus on giving the client the perception that we provide a high quality service, both before the wedding with our detailed planning services and the day of the wedding with our quality performances and attention to details. For us, this has been the most effective method of closing the sale at a price that is higher than the average rate for DJs in our market area. If you leave a bride with the perception that you provide a high quality service that is different from your competitors, do you believe that this bride will book a DJ that is $100 cheaper than you? More often than not, I believe that the bride will pay the additional cost for quality. If you haven’t seen this success, closely examine every aspect of your services (in the categories listed above) for deficiencies. Are you up to snuff? If not, improve your services, marketing materials and phone sales techniques. I am certain you will reap the benefits through increased bookings at higher prices if you do.

- Since we do about 175 weddings annually, we speak with a wide variety of brides. Some brides tell us that the last wedding they attended, the DJ just sat behind the table, and did little (if anything) to motivate the guests on the dance floor. This bride clearly wants a FUN DJ. Other brides we speak with have seen the other extreme – they attended a wedding where the DJ was standing on chairs screaming at the guests, being what we call “the show-off” DJ. It’s up to you to find out what each and every bride wants in the way of personality/interactivity for each wedding. If you explain to the bride that you can offer either the “low key” approach, or the “Fun DJ” approach (in a tasteful manner), you will give her the confidence in your service that you will provide her with the type of personality she is looking for. – We all take this for granted – but keep in mind that the bride has probably been to several weddings in recent years. More importantly, she has probably seen several DJs, with different levels of ability to be a professional Emcee. Most brides want an Emcee that is a professional, who is dressed professionally, and who can Emcee the reception in a professional manner. Most importantly, she doesn’t want an Emcee who will embarrass her in front of her friends and relatives. This means she doesn’t want someone who makes a fool of him or her self on the microphone.- While some brides just assume we have a good variety of music, other brides (and parents!) are concerned that we have the music that they want. This is why we print up our “Most Requested Songs” listing, that is categorized by music type. There are over 800 songs listed on four pages – in compressed print. This keeps the size of the packet small, and the cost to mail it very reasonable. Since weddings are the bulk of what we do, the songs listed are geared to weddings.- Our sales pitch to every bride includes the fact that we will plan every detail of her reception (that pertains to our service). You would be amazed at the number of brides that seem genuinely relieved when we explain to them that we provide this service to them. For this reason, every marketing packet that we send a bride includes our Wedding Reception Planner. This demonstrates that we will plan her reception so that she can relax and enjoy the wedding day.

Planning Weddings: An Important Part of the Service We Provide

I have been performing for wedding receptions for eleven years now and it never ceases to amaze me that I learn something new at every wedding I do. You’d think that after so many years I would have it down, but no no no! The reason I enjoy doing wedding receptions is because for me, every event is different. From the age of the bride and groom to the type of interaction required for the event, to the setting of the facility, I have found that each party has it’s own colors.As you sit back to read this article I will take you though the stages of finalizing plans with a bride and groom as they prepare for their very special day. This part of the event is just as important as the actual wedding day. It’s a time to really connect with the bride and groom. I am very detailed orientated. I feel this is one of the main reasons I attract the type of clientele that will spend a little more money on their entertainment so they are guaranteed that “their day” will be personalized the way they envisioned it to be. I firmly believe that in order to command top dollar for my services, I must provide them with outstanding planning services prior to the wedding. This means giving the client more than five minutes on the phone to plan her wedding.

In addition to the obvious benefits to the bride and groom, taking time to plan and organize a wedding has benefits to you and your company’s reputation. You would be amazed at the number of DJs that show up to a wedding with nothing more than the song title and artist of the bride and groom’s first dance. An unprepared DJ is something that is noticed by everyone, including the banquet manager. Banquet manager’s tend not to refer entertainers who are unprepared, because they come across as amateurs. Don’t allow yourself to be classified in that category because you didn’t take time to plan and organize the reception in advance.

After the couple hires me for their event I send off a finalizing sheet and a general play list. I let them know that these 2 items need to be back in my office at least 2 weeks prior to their wedding day. This will allow me to look over all their information ahead a time so it will be easier for me to attend to all the details.

The finalizing sheet consists of a yes and no questionnaire about the event, a section for sequence of events, special music to be played and a place to list the wedding party including parents, bridesmaids, groomsman, maid/matron of honor, bestman and the all important flower girl and ring bearer.

When I speak with them, I ask very detailed questions because my motto is “It’s better to be well informed than uninformed”. The more I know about the couple and their guests, the smoother the reception will flow. Here are a few of the detailed but very basic questions I ask:

“Do you have your own Champagne Glasses?” Many times the couple will receive glasses as gifts at their shower and will want to use them at the event. Make sure they are at the appropriate table before the reception begins so you won’t be scrambling to find them during the toast.

“Will your Maid/Matron of Honor like to participate in the toast as well?” I use to think because it was called a “Best man’s Toast” that it was proper etiquette to have only the Bestman toast the couple. However, here in Los Angeles, anything goes and many times the Maid/Matron of Honor would like to give a toast also.

“Are parents married to each other or do they have significant others?” The reason I ask this question is because sometimes the parents are included in the Grand Entrance and you want to make sure everyone is paired up appropriately (especially if the divorced parents don’t get along so well).

“Do you want the cake cutting to be “nice” or “not so nice”? How many of you have not asked this question ahead of time? The result being that the crowd coaxes the groom to smash cake and the bride gets all upset? Not a good thing! You have control over the cake cutting and can set the mood. Find out what they want to do ahead of time so there are not bad feelings.

The last two questions I ask are probably the most important.

“Are there any artists or songs you absolutely DO NOT want played at your event?” I ask this question because, for instance, if the bride has been to a million weddings in the last year and has heard “Celebration” (I avoid this song at all cost) at every event, there is a possibility that she won’t want this particular song played at her own wedding. It’s just as important to find out what they don’t want as well as what they do want!
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“What type of interaction are you looking for at your event?” I’ve been noticing lately that either couple wants all the interaction they can get or none at all. This was one of the biggest lessons I learned early on in my career. I did an upscale wedding when I was just getting into interactive DJing and assumed that all my clients would want line dancing (oops). Well, I proceeded to teach the Electric Slide at this party. I got everyone on the dance floor and they totally loved it but the bride later came up to me and asked that I stay away from those types of things because that was not the type of event she wanted. Luckily she was very nice about it and the rest of the party consisted of great music and dancing. From there on in the question of interaction has become a very important part of finalizing.
In the course of the phone call I will go over sequence of events. This is an opportunity for me to really connect with my clients. If I help them set the stage then they will feel more comfortable on their wedding day and actually enjoy the party. I will give them suggestions on where to place all their formalities but let them know that ultimately the final decisions for sequence of events is up to them. This is how I personalize their day. I will also let them know that once the sequence is set, they won’t have to think about it that day because I will inform them 5 minutes in advance what is coming up next. That will give them time to find their husband or wife and/or freshen up. I also let them know that I will be informing the Photographer and Videographer as well so they aren’t in the bathroom or outside taking a break during the first dance. Remember, your not a human jukebox – these are all important services that you provide the day of the wedding, and clients are willing to compensate you accordingly.

The last item to go over is, of course, the music. This can be very easy or very difficult depending on the couple. Some couples want to be totally involved with the decision about music and others will allow me to make the calls. Of course the later is what I prefer most because it’s obvious that the couple trusts me implicitly with the choices I will make for their guests. Typically this type of wedding flies the best. If the couple really want to be involved it’s not a problem. They usually make requests that they think their friends would like to hear and then ask me to fill in with all the nostalgic music for the family and older folks. If I feel that some of their requests they make are better for cocktail and dinner instead of dancing, I will suggest that I play those selections during that time. This is always good because if you start off playing the music they requested from the beginning, you are gaining their trust early in the event. As you can see, being a DJ is very physiological.

I always end the conversation with my clients by telling them if there is anything they need through the course of the evening even if it isn’t entertainment related, to please send who ever their liaison is to me and I will take care of it. I want to make sure the bride and groom have the best time and that I am there to take care of the little things so they can enjoy their own wedding day. This is my main thrust. I think that every DJ is individual and each one of us attracts a certain type of couple. Most of my clients want to be taken care of with not only the main specifics of a wedding but also the little things. Remember, for a woman (and most of the time you will be dealing with the bride) it’s the little things that count!

So You Want To Be A Wedding DJ?

Well, before you just jump right into it, there are a lot of considerations to think about before investing the time, energy, and money necessary in becoming a wedding DJ.SOME QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER

Do you have the ability to handle difficult situations tactfully and gracefully without panicking or stressing out?

Do you have the eloquence and charisma to motivate and influence people in the right way?

Are you able to groom and dress yourself appropriately for such a formal affair?

Can you be clean-shaven and not have bad breath? Can you look good in a tuxedo?

Are you a DJ who is willing to play music you dislike or even hate? Every year some song comes around that people want to hear over and over… Can you be a pleasant person and have a confident smile on your face while playing music you don’t like? Even play it twice in one evening? How about the same song, like… the Macarena… once every hour? God forbid…

Temptation can be strong at a wedding reception. Can you control yourself from overindulging in alcohol and women? (Or men depending on your gender or sexual preference). Can you control yourself from losing your sobriety?

What would you do if you have 300 guests and the electricity goes out?

You must also be able to handle all walks of life, including kids. Some parents will have all their kids there and want to get rid of them so they tell them to go and hang out with the DJ. Yikes! Can you be a baby sitter and do the Macarena at the same time?

What will you do if the banquet manager wants the music turned down and the bride or groom insists on it being louder?

What do you do when the father of the bride, who is the one paying you, is drunk and belligerent and demands… Russian marching songs?!! But the bride wants nothing but disco, how do you handle that?

How will you handle emotional family members, a hypochondriac maid of honor, loud, obnoxious, spoiled, bratty kids, and loud, obnoxious, soiled family drunks?

Are you able to handle all these situations? How about all these situations all at once?

There are many difficult situations that may arise. You have to be witty, think fast, improvise, be quick on your feet, and be able to handle crisis situations.

If you can’t handle the pressure, you better not pursue becoming a wedding DJ.

CAN YOU BE A WEDDING PROFESSIONAL?

Aside from dealing with the guests at a wedding reception, maybe even more paramount is the ability to deal with other wedding professionals such as photographers, videographers, caterers, wait staff, wedding consultants, banquet managers, singers, musicians, and ministers. Other than the bride and groom, these people are the people DJs work with the most – some are spectacular, some are imbeciles. But, you absolutely CANNOT let personality conflicts affect the wedding!!! Compromise, NOT confrontation, is the rule among professionals.

PERSONALITY

To be a wedding DJ you have to have a certain personality, have to be able to adapt and improvise, be able to handle adversity well, and have to be able to control the atmosphere and mood of the event. You have to be able to read the audience and play to the crowd. You cannot be the type of DJ who will freak out and crack under pressure!

As a wedding DJ you have to be very organized; if you are not organized, it will definitely be evident to the client when it comes to the interview and consultation with the bride and groom. If you are not organized, you will never convince anyone of choosing you for their most important gig: their wedding! Be completely prepared before the initial consultation. You must know the protocol and progression of events that will occur during the wedding reception.

You need to find out from the bride and groom what kind of DJ they are looking for and be that person. Do they want someone who is really interactive with the audience and who uses the microphone often, or someone who just stays in the shadows and strictly plays the music? I ask my clients using a rating system of 1 to 10, 1 being quiet, having no interaction with the guests, and being in the shadows, and 10 being the center of attention, leading the party, getting people involved, and heavy interaction with the crowd.

The bride and groom want to be comfortable on their wedding day. You need to know how the bride and groom want things to be said and done and how things will be coordinated between themselves, you, and the other wedding professionals. You have to show that everything is under control and make them as relaxed as possible. Make them confident in you, and don’t let them worry – they have enough things to worry about.

EQUIPMENT

Do you have your own equipment? Or do you have to rent? Is your equipment reliable?

Are you able to transport your own equipment? Do you have the ability to lift and carry the equipment? If not, do you have the personnel to help you?

Do you need a light show? In California, generally about 80% of our wedding clients do not want a light show at their wedding reception.

Many situations can arise and problems can and will happen. What will you do in a bind? Can you improvise? I don’t normally bring my own table. What will you do when you aren’t provided a table to use? In instances where a DJ table was not provided and unavailable, (even though I was told there would be one available) I have used a waiter stand, and a bail of hay.

Your equipment must be of good to excellent quality, and most importantly, be reliable. Remember, a wedding is suppose to be a once-in-a-lifetime event (at least, most people start out hoping that will be the case!). There are no second chances if you choose to enter the wedding arena with equipment that is less than reliable.

I give my DJs simple systems mounted in a standard carpeted rack to protect the equipment, which, in old-school terminology, is called a coffin.

EQUIPMENT:

2 CD players – I like dual CD units.
mixing board – at least 3 line inputs with high, mid, and low EQ settings, and 2 microphone inputs
A dependable amplifier – I like at least 300watts/channel at 8 ohms
2 full range speakers – preferably good sounding commercial strength with handles, strong grills, and reinforced corners, and wattage compatibility with amplifier.
2 microphones – one is mounted on my mixing board, and one is cordless to pass around.
*Note – The microphones are an important part of your gig. You will be using them often, and the wireless will go through a lot of different people, will get dropped, and might even get tossed around. The microphones must be high quality – if they are cheap your show will suffer – speech will be distorted, sound bad, have a lot of static, have a lot of feedback, or even not work at all.

speaker wires, RCA connectors, power strips, extension cords, and adapters
ALL DJs should have a backup system – as a minimum you should have a backup amplifier, and a backup CD player. I have used a single CD player in a bind and just talked while I was changing the CDs. I always have two microphones just in case one goes out. Of course I always have two speakers also. It is not probable that both speakers and both microphones will go out at the same time.

MUSIC

Do you have the music required to meet professional standards for performing at weddings? If your “oldies” from the 50/60′s era consists of three or four compilation CDs purchased at your local music shop, you really aren’t qualified to perform at weddings. If you have provided music for school or club gigs, and do not have a good variety of oldies, big band and country, perhaps you should re-evaluate whether or not you should be taking weddings. It isn’t fair to the bride, groom and everyone who attends the wedding if you have mislead the client into thinking that you have an in-depth music library that allows you to play a variety of music, and handle most of the requests that you receive from the guests.

REWARDS

I have listed a lot of the problems and pitfalls that can happen, but I have not yet listed the rewards of being a DJ… Which is after all, why I’m a wedding DJ!

The rewards are ten times better than the problems. You get a lot of immediate gratification, when everyone praises you about how well you have performed. Maybe the father of the bride will thank you for making this the happiest day of his daughter’s life. Perhaps other people attending will ask you to DJ their wedding receptions or other events. You might be introduced to famous, powerful, prestigious people and even gain their business; and you may even get even better introductions and phone numbers – use your imagination here ; )

Some even more immediate rewards are when people are going wild on the dance floor and the people paying you don’t want to stop the party and you get overtime bonus pay and tips.

If you are good, you will get compliments, get business referrals, meet important people, and just have an overall good time. There have been innumerable occasions where I was having such a good time I would think to myself, “Wow, I’m getting paid to do this!”

ARE YOU CUT OUT TO BE A WEDDING DJ?

I have offered a lot of the pros and cons to being a wedding DJ. Its up to you to decide if you have what it takes to succeed in the wedding market. All too often, DJs take weddings who are not qualified or prepared for the job, because the money is good. This has a negative impact to the clients who hire the DJ expecting a good quality performance, and a professional level of service. Lets face it, performing at weddings isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. In contrast, if you feel that you have what it takes to be a wedding DJ, I think you will find them to be both fun and profitable.

COMING UP:

In the next article I will talk about the protocol of a wedding reception and how to promote your DJ Business. I will talk about specialized music, how we do things in my area compared to other areas, about being an interactive DJ, and specific things you can do to involve and liven up the crowd.

“Paradise Mike” Alexander has been the moderator of the wedding panel of the Int’l DJ Convention in Atlantic City for the last 6 years. He has been DJing weddings for 19 years, and has done over 2000 wedding receptions. He is the owner of Paradise Entertainment & DJ Company in northern Santa Barbara County that performs at about 800 events annually.

Guide To Wedding Reception Event Introductions

IntroductionOne of the most intimidating tasks for a disc jockey new to wedding receptions is how to introduce the events. This piece is a collection of ideas used by other disc jockeys from different parts of the country. Each contributor is presenting an entire wedding formalities script. The sequence in which each DJ presents these is only a suggestion based on his or her experience. During your consultation with the bride and groom you will identify the sequence they prefer and what events they may or may not want to include.
Because this article compiles many different suggestions it is arranged for easier navigation by author. There are three sets of sample scripts for wedding events below. Simply click on each author to get his or her version of how to announce each wedding event!

Jamie Simpson
Houserocker’s Mobile Disc Jockey Service
Clarion, PA
Introductions
Before you start, get everyone’s attention by stopping the cocktail music and saying….
“Ladies and Gentlemen, it looks like our bridal party has arrived…if I could please have everyone’s attention.” Repeat as many times as necessary until everyone is quiet.
(music cue)
“Good evening ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the beautiful (name of facility) here in (name of city and state).”
“I’ll be your host for the evening, (your first and last name) from (your company name).”
“And now…if I could please direct your attention to the entrance way…It is time to introduce our bridal party!!!!!”
“First we have….
“Next we have….(bridesmaid) being escorted by….(groomsman)…Let’s give them a big hand.”
Repeat with some variation for each couple in the bridal party. It’s nice to also include a brief mention of the relationship to the bride or groom, i.e. cousin, college roommate. Continue to prompt for applause at the end of each introduction.
(music cue)
“And now…here they are…being introduced for the first time as husband and wife…please give them a nice standing ovation…the new Mr. And Mrs. (however they’ve told you they want to be introduced)!!!!!!
After all are standing at the head table…
” Ladies and Gentleman this is you opportunity to take a picture of the bridal party for your own personal memories. So feel free to come right in front with your camera or camcorder as our bridal party puts on their million dollar smiles.”
Toast
“Ladies and gentlemen it looks like we are almost ready for our toast….folks make sure you have something to drink to toast our bride and groom as the champagne is being poured.”
Give them enough time to get ready (2-5 minutes.) Should be pre-poured if possible.
“Ladies and gentlemen it looks like we are ready for our toast…. Now I was speaking with our best man a little bit outside….. and he told me he has been working on this toast for the last few days,…weeks …….. months ………. burning the midnight oil to try to find the appropriate words for our newlyweds …………. so folks with out further delay, please give our best man a nice round of applause performing our toast!”
After the toast is finished say….
“Let’s give our best man a nice hand for a great toast!!!!”
Blessing
“At this time I would like to find (name of person giving the toast) who will be performing out blessing.”…. (Find the person)….”Let’s give him/her a nice round of applause.”
After the blessing…”
“Thank you very much (name of person).”
Dinner
“It looks like we are ready for this evenings meal ……….Tonight’s meal will be buffet style and (yourself or banquet manager) will be escorting you to the buffet, so please remain seated until (name) comes to your table.”
“The bar will remain closed (or open, but this is rare) throughout dinner BUT you are more than welcome to help yourself to the punch and soda.”
“You know folks the only thing we are missing is our bride and grooms first official kiss of the reception….. Let’s here those glasses make some chatter ….
(Have the bride and groom stand up, make sure every glass is ringing and count off 1, 2,3 ….)
By the looks of that kiss, I don’t think our bride and groom would mind you making chatter throughout tonight’s reception!
Once again I’m (name) with (company name)…. sit, back, relax, and enjoy your meal!!!”
During dinner:
If you are running the buffet have fun with the tables don’t be a stick in the mud (Make sure you keep them moving) Regular or Lottery….make sure it’s discussed before hand.)
Check on the bride and groom and see if they need anything (drink, announcement-whatever…)
After everyone’s through buffet fine … then you can eat.
Go up to B&G and let them know of the approaching events and how quickly you would like to get them done. Find best man and maid of honor and inform them of their jobs for bouquet/garter and dollar dance.
Make sure photographer/videographer is informed of approaching events.
CuttingtheCake
Make sure you have consulted with the bride and groom to see if they are ready!!!!
“Ladies and gentlemen….at this time it is time for our newlyweds to cut the wedding cake. You’re more than welcome to grab your camera, and camcorder to take pictures for your memories….”
(cue music…Once couple has the cake cut and ready to feed, count it off for them.. “Here we go Mr. and Mrs. (name)….on the count of 3…1,2,3.”)
“Let’s give our newlyweds a nice round of applause…. the cake will be served shortly folks and coming up in about 15 minutes will be our bride and grooms first dance!!!!”
(When you are ready to start the events consult with B&G and make sure they are ready. Make an announcement for all members of the bridal party to make their way back to the head table. Find mom and Dad(s) and tell them their roles for the events.)
First Dance
“And now ladies and gentlemen we would like to bring out our newlyweds, (Mr. & Mrs. Name), to dance their first dance as husband and wife. Let’s give them a hand.”
(cue music)
“They will be dancing to (Song Name) by (Artist).”
When finished…
“Let’s give our newlyweds a nice hand.”
Bridal Party Dance
“Now joining the bride and groom on the dance floor will be the bridal party for….the bridal party dance….here’s a song picked out for you from the bride and groom ……(Name of Song and Name of Artist)”
(cue music) …
“So at this time if we could have the entire bridal party out on the floor dancing the bridal party dance!!!!”
Another way of doing this is calling the bridal party by couple and having them dance.
(After)
“Let’s give the bridal party a big hand for being such good friends to the bride and groom!!!!”
Father/Daughter Dance
“And now we would like to clear the dance floor for everyone except our bride…and (Bride’s name), if you could find your dad, (Announce father’s name, when he’s there continue.) It looks like we are ready for our father/daughter dance”…(pause…cue music) “Here’s a song picked just for you dad…. (Name of Song).
(When done)
“Dad … give your daughter a nice big kiss …… and folks lets give them a nice round of applause….the (Bride’s Family Surname) Family!!!!”
Mother/Son Dance
“Not only are we going to do a Father/Daughter dance…. but a Mother/Son dance as well….so, (Groom’s name), grab your mom, (announce her name), and bring her to the dance floor….(cue music) …. Mom, here’s a special song picked for you from your son…(Song Name.)”
(After) “Mom give your son a nice big kiss….and ladies and gentlemen give the (Groom’s Family Surname) Family a nice round of applause !!!!!!”
Bouquet/Garter
“Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for the MAIN EVENT…. the bouquet and garter toss. I will need all the single ladies on this side of the dance floor and all of the single men on this side of the dance floor with our bride and groom right here in the center.
(Say this several times making sure you get the bride and groom involved calling people up.)
STEP 1 Garter Removal
“We need our audience here to cheer on our groom as he takes off his wife’s garter … But (Groom’s Name), I need to give you a few words of advice before you proceeded …( cue music)…. You are going into the land of the unknown …. the forbidden territory …. the final frontier…. Be kind and be gentle because if you are not she will let you know for the rest of your married life ……… (cue music)….. Now (Groom’s Name), I think we need a little pre garter removal dance for your new wife…. everyone clap your hands…. let’s go (Groom’s Name)…. ”
“Here we go on the count of 3 we will turn you loose…..1…..2…..3…. (cue music)….Let’s give the groom a nice hand….great job (Groom’s Name)!!!!”
STEP 2 Garter Toss
(cue music)
“Now that we have our garter…. let’s toss it to those bachelors…. you ready men? Now we only have one rule for you men in this garter toss…. SOMEONE HAS TO CATCH IT…. Here we go (Groom’s Name)….on the count of 3….audience help me out…. 1…. 2…..3….”
STEP 3 Bouquet Toss
(cue music)
Alright Ladies. … now it’s your turn…. Now ladies, you know the tradition that the lady that catches this bouquet will be the next one married….so there is a lot ridding on this toss…. so listen to the rules…. no biting …. kicking …. pulling hair …. we want a clean contest…. here we go (Bride’s Name) on the count of 3 …. folks help me out….1…………..2……….3…..”
Step 4
“If we could have the lady that caught the bouquet have a seat here in the chair…. and the gentlemen that caught the garter up here as well…. Now do you know each other? …. Well you’re about to become a lot better acquainted…. here are the rules….. for every inch that garter goes above her knee, that’s ten years of good luck for the bride and groom…. What do you say buddy?…. Let’s go for the century mark….Here we go, on the count of 3 we will turn you loose…. folks help me out….1…..2… 3…. (cue music) Let’s give them a nice round of applause for being such good sports….”
Dollar Dance
Make sure everything has been set up 2 or 3 events prior. Explain to the bestman and the maid of honor how you want things arranged.
“Folks…. find your purses and wallets … it’s now time for our dollar dance where you will get your chance to dance with either the bride or groom.”
“Our maid of honor … will be standing here taking the money…. you can give a dollar…. but don’t be afraid to give 2, 5, 10, 20 dollars for our couple…. then you can dance with the bride or groom …. and then see our best man for a good luck shot.” (repeat again)
“Let’s get some people in line and get ready to start our dollar dance…. now maid of honor…. you have 5 songs to get everyone through…. or else you have to give the couple 20 dollars for every song you go over jokingly, but getting the point across)…. ok folks ….. let’s start our dollar dance” (Make sure you count down how man songs are left.)
(When finished) “Let’s have our groom pick up the bride and take her away…let’s give them a big hand!!!!”
Opening the Dance Floor
“Ladies and gentlemen, that is the end of our formal events. Now we would like to open the dancing to everyone. So, husbands grab your wives, boyfriends grab your girlfriends and join the newlyweds on the dance floor for this open slow dance.”

Paul Beardmore
The DJ Connection
Fort Royal, VA
Introductions
Special notes: When the first person is introduced(normally the brides parents), immediately ask for a round of applause. Sometimes the crowd will forget to clap, creating a dull introduction. In addition, you need to pace your introductions appropriately. You can go too fast or too slow. A good indicator is to listen to the applause; wait for the applause to START to subside, then go to the next person to be introduced. If you pace yourself too fast, you will sound unprofessional and rushed (not to mention making the photographer mad). If you pace yourself too slow, your introduction will be boring. Introduce the wedding party in a professional manner, not like a circus announcer. When you get to the bride and groom, build it up with dynamic enthusiasm.
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please. (repeat if necessary) The bridal party has arrived, and I would like to introduce them to you. But first, I would like to introduce myself; my name is _________ and I’m from The D.J. Connection; I’ll be acting as Master of Ceremonies for the reception this afternoon/evening.”
“First, the brides parents, Mr. and Mrs. ________________; let’s hear it for them (always ask for applause after the first introduction).
Next, the grooms parents, Mr. and Mrs._____________________
Next, the ushers and bridesmaids: (announce all ushers and bridesmaids)
The ring bearer, _________ escorting the flower girl,_______________.
The Best Man, ___________escorting the maid/matron of honor, ___________.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my honor and privilege this evening to introduce, Mr. and Mrs.____________________.”
Receiving Line
“Ladies and gentleman, a receiving line has been formed, and I would
like to invite everyone to come up and greet the bride, groom and the entire bridal party…………..thank you”
Toast and Cake Cutting(done together)
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please………..at this time, the best man will toast the bride and groom, and then after that, the bride and groom will cut the cake. Please feel free to gather around the caketable for pictures or to get a closer look. I would like to ask everyone to give our professional photographer plenty of room to work………..thank you”
You need to pay attention to the best man (or the person who is giving the toast) and when it seems that he is ready to start the toast, you should announce:
“Ladies and gentleman, the best man is now ready to propose the toast to the bride and groom;……..please give him your un-divided attention…….thank you.”
Once the cake is cut, and the bride and groom have feed one another, encourage the groom to give the bride a nice, gentle kiss.
In the event that the toast and cake cutting are done separately, make the necessary adjustments to your phrasing.
Sit-Down Dinner
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please; at this time, I would like to ask everyone to take their seats, as dinner is about to be served” (Repeat as necessary)
Buffet Dinner (bridal party first)
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please;………the buffet is now open. At this time I would like the bride, groom, and the entire wedding party and parents to serve themselves to the buffet, and the rest of the guests to follow them………..thank you”
You will normally have to repeat this. Make sure that the buffet is ready to be served prior to announcing. In the event that there are table numbers, you should take it upon yourself to announce that the wedding party will be serving themselves to the buffet first, and:
“I will call the rest of the guests by table number.”
You should first observe the number of tables, and usually call two or three tables at a time. It is important to keep the line moving, so you must pay attention.
Buffet Dinner (guests first)
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please;…….the buffet is now open. I would like to invite everyone to go through the buffet line and serve themselves something to eat………….thank you”
See the listing above about excusing the guests by table number, if they are provided.
First Dance
Before starting the first dance, check with the bride and groom to make sure that they are ready for this event. Once you have announced the first dance, you should not start the song until the bride and groom are close to the dance floor and it is obvious that they intend to start dancing right away. Before announcing the first dance, make sure that you cue up the first dance song.
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please…….at this time I would like to call the bride and groom out to the center of the dance floor, so they may share their first dance, as husband and wife”………… lets have a big round of applause for Mr. and Mrs:__________________”
You should ask for a round of applause for the bride and groom twice….once at the beginning of the first dance, and once at the end.
Brides Dance With Father
“Ladies and Gentleman, at this time, I would like to call the bride’s Father out to the dance floor to share a traditional dance with his daughter”
Do not start the song until the bride’s father is close to the dance floor. Just as with the first dance, you should ask for a round of applause twice, once at the beginning and once at the end of the dance.
Groom’s Dance With Mother
“At this time, I would like to call the groom and his mother out to the dance floor so they may share a special dance together……….let’s give the groom and his mother a warm round of applause!”
As with the other dances, don’t start the song until the groom and his mother are close to the dance floor.
Bridal Party/Parents Dance
Sometimes there is only a bridal party dance, in which case you would not call the parents out. In other instances, there is only a parents dance, in which case you would not call the bridal party out. The example listed below assumes that you are having a bridal party and parents dance. You should adjust the phrasing in the event that the bride and groom only want the wedding party, or the parents by themselves.
“At this time, I would like to call the rest of the parents and the entire wedding party out to the dance floor for the bridal party and parents dance”
You will most likely have to repeat your request for the entire bridal party and parents to come out……this is to be expected. You should say:
“Once again, if I could please have the parents and wedding party come out to the dance floor”
Starting The Dancing
“Ladies and gentleman, the dance floor is now open; ………….the bride and groom would like for everyone to join them on the dance floor”
When starting your first uptempo song, re-introduce yourself (talking over the first part of the song) and tell the guests that you are taking danceable requests. The following example should be announced over top of the first up-tempo song:
“It’s time to get this party going,…….once again my name is ______ and I’ll be taking danceable requests throughout the afternoon/evening. The bride and groom really want to see everyone get out on the dance floor, so come on out!!”
Dollar Dance
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please……….at this time, we’d like to give everyone a chance to dance with the bride and groom by having a dollar dance. For those of you who do not know what a dollar dance is, I’ll be happy to explain how this works…………we would like to invite the ladies to form a line to dance with the groom, and the gentleman to form a line to dance with the bride. The Best Man and The Maid of Honor will be at the front of each line to collect your donation to dance with the bride and groom. Your donation can be one dollar, 5 dollars, 20 dollars, or whatever you would like to donate to the bride and groom for extra spending money for their honeymoon. This will give everyone a chance to say hello to the bride and groom, so I would like to encourage everyone to come out and participate.”
It is often very difficult to get people out of their chairs to participate in a dollar dance. This event requires that you continually “drum it up”. This includes repeating yourself when you initially call everyone out, and even after you start the music, you will need to talk over the music and say:
“Once again, ladies and gentleman, our dollar dance is underway, and we still have a lot of people who are in their seats………don’t miss your opportunity to dance with the bride and groom.”
Bouquet/Garter Toss
Once you have checked with the bride and groom and determined that you are ready to do the bouquet and garter toss, check with the photographer to ensure that he/she is ready for this event. Prior to announcing this event, you should cue up all specialty songs you plan to use. You should also have a classic slow song to go back to dancing immediately upon completion of the event.
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please……….at this time I would like all of the single ladies in the audience to come forward, as the bride is ready to toss the bouquet…………………….once again, we need all of the single ladies to come forward;………………..don’t be shy ladies………..”
You will probably have to repeat this several times……..you can ask the bride to call by name any single ladies who haven’t come out, and then call those single girls by name who have not come forward. Once you have called the single ladies out, confer with the bride and tell her not to throw the bouquet until you give her a count of three. Also warn her if the ceiling is low, or if there is a chandelier in the way. You should also ask the photographer if he wants to do a fake toss, or just photograph the real thing.
“Allllriiiight!!! let’s toss the bouquet on the count of three!
One!, Two!, Threeeee!!!”
When giving the countdown, you should be enthusiastic and exciting.
The Garter Routine
After the bouquet toss, get the name of the lady who caught the bouquet (assuming that the guy who catches the garter is to place it on the lady who caught the bouquet).
“At this time, I would like to call all of the single gentleman in the crowd to come out to the dance floor as the groom is about to remove the garter………
Once again, we need all of the single guys in the audience to come forward.”
Have the groom scan the room and find any single guys who are “hiding”, and call these people out by name. You can have a little fun with this. You can announce over the mic :
“We will call you by name if you don’t come forward, so make it easy on yourself”
Confer with the groom, and instruct him not to remove the garter until you tell him to do so. Begin music and announce:
“Lets give the bride and groom a little “mood music”!
Once the groom has removed the garter, tell him not to throw it until you give him a three-count (you can do this when you initially confer with him).
“All right!!, lets toss the garter on the count of three………………..
One!, Two!, Threeeeeee!!!!
Placing The Garter on The Girl Who Caught The Bouquet
Advise the guy (you should get his name) who caught the garter to stay on the dance floor.
“At this time, I would like the young lady who caught the bouquet to come forward………”
Have the girl who caught the bouquet take a seat. You can use the groomsman in the same manner that you did with the bride, as long as you feel that the personalities involved are appropriate. Tell the guy that caught the garter not to start until you tell him to. Cue up your music. Once everyone is in place, explain the following:
“Ladies and gentleman, I proudly introduce to you our participants, ___________ and ______________!!! Ladies and gentleman, we have a tradition here at The DJ Connection……………(pause)……….Our tradition is that for every inch above the knee that this gentleman places the garter, is seven years of good luck for the bride and groom……….pause……Now we all want the bride and groom to have a long and happy marriage, don’t we?”
“There’s one small catch to this tradition, so listen up!………we’re not going to allow (Name of guy who caught the garter) to decide how fare above the knee to place the garter. We want you, the audience to clap, cheer, and make as much noise as possible until you think that he has placed the garter high enough…………..and when he does, you can stop.”
(Start your music here.)
“Alllllllllrightttttttt!!!!!! Lets hear plenty of noise from everyone!!
You will probably have to ask for more noise a few more times. Once it is over, you should announce:
“I think the bride and groom will have 150 years of good luck!!!! Let’s have a round of applause for our participants!!!!”
Bride and Groom’s Last Dance
“Ladies and gentleman, may I have your attention please…………at this time, I would like to call the bride and groom out to the dance floor so they may share the last dance before leaving the reception. I would also like to have everyone come out to the dance floor and form a circle around the bride and groom. Once again, I would like all of the guests to come forward to the dance floor to give the bride and groom a great send-off!!!”
“Ladies and gentleman, I still see a lot of people in their chairs, I would like
to ask everyone to please come forward for the bride and groom’s last dance”.
Having everyone form a circle around the bride and groom for their last dance is an excellent way to end the reception on a positive note, even with those receptions that have very little dancing!!! It creates a very warm and positive atmosphere, and makes you, the DJ look very professional. It should be emphasized, that you will have to request that the guests come out and form a circle a few times. You usually need to drum this one up!! Be patient!! Don’t start the song for the last dance until you have most of the guests out on the dance floor, and formed in a circle.
At the beginning of the last dance, and again at the end of the song, you should announce:
“Let’s have a big round of applause for Mr. and Mrs._______________!!!

Kenny Zail
Party Hits Entertainment
Atlanta, GA
This is directed at the newer DJ that is about to do a wedding.The first thing to do is make sure you have “control” of the reception. Let the guests know that you are going to conducting the events this evening.
I have found that it takes 5-7 words before you will get the attention of the audience, so you need to start off each announcement slowly and have some kind of intro before you get to the vital information that you want to relay to the audience.
I like to have my first announcement before the bridal arrives and set the tone to the guests, for example:
“Good evening everyone, welcome to the (name of venue), my name is _____, I will be your emcee for the (Surnames of Bride & Groom) reception. I’ve been informed that the bridal party are on their way…..in the meantime, sample the appetizers and have a beverage. I will be getting back to you in a few minutes.
This sends a signal that I will have information to relay and that you should quiet down when you hear my voice.
Let me say this at the beginning……….The bride and groom pay a lot of money for my services and most expect an elegant reception with lots of energy, so I don’t do anything funny or hokey or crazy unless the bride or groom have specifically ask for me to do so.
Introductions
When the bridal party arrives, I first check to see if they are all there. I go over their name pronunciations [even though I have gotten the names from the bride or groom, I find sometimes even the bride or groom doesn't know the correct pronunciation]. I now line them up in order and tell them where they should walk [dance floor, head table, etc.] I don’t take their coats or get them a drink or anything like that. Everything being ready…I like to play a timpani roll and say something like this:
“Ladies & gentlemen, I would like for you to direct your attention to the (staircase, front doors etc.)……it is my pleasure to introduce to you the bridal party.”
I will then announce them in, with a song like Alan Parson Projects’ ‘Sirius.’
Blessing
If there is a blessing I would give everyone a moment to settle down and say this:
“Attention everyone…(pause)…before we get started with the festivities tonight, I want to introduce (Name of Preacher/Priest/Person) to say a few words……….(Title, i.e. Father)…..”
Always do pauses, long pauses if necessary it tends to get the guests to quiet down.
Toast
If there is a toast to do next:
” If everyone will get their glasses ready for the toast………let me introduce (the bestman, maid of honor, etc.) [Name of Person].
Dinner
After the toast, if it is done at the beginning of the reception, it is on to the food.
If it is a “seated buffet”, where the guests are seated at tables waiting for a signal to get in line, you might suggest to the bride and groom, that you call out table numbers to alleviate long lines at the food stations. Especially if there are a number of tables, say over 10. (This suggestion should be brought up at one of your consultations with the couple before the wedding day.)
Here you can have some fun with deciding when what table is going to get in line. Use your creativity to come up with ideas to decide on the tables to go next.
For example:
At what table is the longest married couple?
At what table is the person with the next birthday?
The table with the youngest member of the Porter Family.
What table has the hands in their laps and sitting up straight?
Use a bingo machine and call out numbers!
The first table to know the name of the bride’s high school, etc.
Use trivia questions.
The simplest, is to just say “tables #2 & #14 are next”.
It is important to write down what tables have gotten in line so you don’t lose track of what tables are left.
If the buffet is not formally seated, meaning guests can sit where ever they choose, all you need to do is announce the buffet is open and play background music. You will lose their attention for a while, and you need to have a plan on how you are going to regain control. If the bride & groom have not done their first dance yet, there is where you will gain everyone’s attention again. If all those kind of dances are done, use your creativity again. You can always use the bride & groom or the parents of the bridal couple to gain attention of the guests. The guests will always follow the lead of the bride & groom.
For example:
“Don & Jenny have asked that everyone come out to the dance floor at this time”….(long pause),
[make sure the Don & Jenny are coming out to the floor]…now you can do
A conga line
A new line dance
YMCA
A “anniversary dance” (couples married less than 5 years, 10, 15 etc.)
Just a good dance song
If this is a “sit-down dinner”, this is where the guests remain seated and the food is served to them, you can do many things. Don’t let this time go to waste and just play dinner music. This is where you can “sew the seeds” of a great party.
For example:
Go to each table introduce yourself and ask for requests
Create a skit by passing out “new” song lyrics to a familiar song i.e. “On the first day of marriage my true love gave to me……Pass out copies, one verse to each table and conduct the show.
Guests at a table need to come to the dance floor and sing a song with “love” in the lyrics for the bride & groom to kiss.
Couples at tables “perform a kiss” and the bride & groom have to imitate the kiss.
It is important to remember not to force something that doesn’t look like it is going to work. Do not do something that will embarrass someone. And always get permission from the bride or groom first.
Now the food has been eaten. If it has been OK’d by the bride and groom, you can do the cake cutting now which will again get the attention of all the guests and put you back in control. As the bride and groom move to the cake, mention to the guests this would be a good time bring out their cameras. Tell the guests to give the professional photographer the right of way of course. As the photographer is directing the bride and groom, you might recite the origin of the cake cutting tradition to the guests.
Opening the Dance Floor
The dancing is ready to begin, I find that a ballad works well to get the couples on the floor and suggests to the older guests that you are not going to blast them out of the reception. Invite the guests to the dance floor with a statement like:
“Gentleman, the bride and groom have asked that you bring your favorite partner to the dance floor at this time.”
If this song works well, and the dance floor is full, play one more slow song, to accommodate the guests that just got on the floor, and to keep the momentum going.
After this, you should have 3-4 fast songs ready to choose from. All should be big hits, don’t chance this moment with anything that won’t be a favorite. Look at your dance floor…do you have mostly an over 40 crowd? Do you have mostly the bridal party and close friends of bride and groom? Have you got a big variety on the floor dance? You need a different song for each of these situations.
Bouquet & Garter Toss
Now it is time for the bouquet and possibly the garter toss. Ask the photographer which they want to do first, (this and the cake cutting are two major events that the photographer will want to conduct, remember the bride and groom hired them too). Let the photographer know this is coming two songs ahead.
There are many things that can be done at this time, what is next are the most standard ways to handle the bouquet and garter. Keep in mind that, in general, the higher end weddings will want less rather than more, avoid embarrassing anyone, or doing anything that, for lack of a better word, is “cheesy”. To go up the ladder of weddings, you need to conduct yourself as if you are already there.
Start with a song that works well for announcing…Begin with an announcement like:
“Ladies and Gentlemen: It is time for the bouquet and garter, let’s have all the single gentlemen on the dance floor.”
Having your special songs for the bouquet and garter prerecorded in order helps in this situation because the changes happen quickly and you need to be prepared.
Now you want to have a chair on the dance floor. Ask for the bride to sit down and the groom to kneel in front of her. Begin a new song for taking off the garter. As soon as the garter has been removed say something like this,( before the groom can toss the garter prematurely. )
“Don we’re going to throw the garter on the count of three, but first, Jenny I suggest you move…these guys look like there desperate, and can we get the chair removed to avoid any blood on the dance floor.
Photographers… are you ready
(You don’t want to do it twice…Play a drum roll.)
One…..two……three……”
Comment on what a good catch or” if it touched you, you own it”.
Play another song for the single women.
“It’s time for the bouquet toss, let’s have all the single ladies on the dance floor.
Photographers are you ready…
(Play the drum roll)
One….two….three….”
If there is more dancing after the bouquet and garter, once the crowd settles down have a favorite song ready to play, generally a song to please the bridal party since they will probably be the ones who were involved it catching the bouquet and garter.
The Party’s Over…
The last song of the reception can be fast or slow, it will depend on your style. Before the song is ending make that final announcement the give the bride and groom a round of applause. Use something like this:
“Ladies and gentlemen let’s hear it one more time for our bride and groom, Don & Jenny, the new Mr. & Mrs. (Name)…..”
Thank everyone for helping you make this a great reception. (You can’t do anything without their help).
At the end of the reception there may be a send off, when the bride and groom will wait until all the guests have made a walkway for the bride and groom to walk through. This is when the bubbles, birdseed, butterflies, etc. are brought out and given to the guests as a final salute to the bride and groom.
Make the announcement where the guests need to line up, who has the “bubbles” and for everyone to bring their cameras etc.

Sample Wedding Event Worksheet

Sample Wedding Event Worksheet

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Wedding Events WorksheetBrides Name:_____________________________________________________
Grooms Name:_____________________________________________________

Wedding Date:________________________________
Reception Time:__________
# Of Guests Attending:__________

Reception Location:___________________________________________________
Directions To Reception(maps are appreciated):______________________________

Introduction of Bridal Party – Yes_____ No_____

Receiving Line – Yes_____ No_____

Blessing/Grace – Yes_____ No_____
f yes, by whom:_____________________________________________________

Sit Down Dinner (served by banquet staff) – Yes_____ No_____

Buffet/Hourderves – Yes_____ No_____ Bridal Party First? Yes_____ No_____

Music During Buffet/Dinner: _____Light Background _____Up-Tempo/Dance Music______

Toast – Yes_____ No_____
If yes, by whom:_____________________________________________________

Cake Cutting – Yes_____ No_____

First Dance as Husband and Wife – Yes_____ No_____
If yes, list the song title and artist:________________________________________________

Brides Dance With Father – Yes_____ No_____
Song/Artist:_________________________________________________

Grooms Dance With Mother – Yes_____ No_____
Song/Artist:________________________________________________

Bridal Party and/or Parents Dance (circle appropriate people)

Yes_____ No_____
If yes, please list song title and artist:_____________________________________________

Dollar Dance – Yes_____ No_____

Bouquet Toss – Yes_____ No_____ Ages 16 or Older? – Yes_____ No_____

Garter Removal/Toss – Yes_____ No_____ Ages 16 or Older? – Yes_____ No_____

Do You Want The Gentleman That Catches The Garter To Place It On The Lady Who Catches The Bouquet? – Yes_____ No_____

Bride and Grooms Last Dance – Yes_____ No_____
Song/Artist:__________________________________________________

Bridal Party Introduction

Brides Parents :____________________________________________

:__________________________________________________________

Grooms Parents:_____________________________________:_________________________

Groomsman and Bridesmaids

Groomsman Escorting Bridesmaid

________________________________ ________________________________

________________________________ ________________________________

________________________________ ________________________________

________________________________ ________________________________

________________________________ ________________________________

________________________________ ________________________________

________________________________ ________________________________

Ring Bearer:_____________________________________________________

Flower Girl:_______________________________________________________

Best Man:______________________________________________________

Maid/Matron of Honor:_____________________________________________

Bride and Groom

Mr. & Mrs._______________________________________________________

Remarks:___________________________________________________

Providing Music for a Wedding Ceremony

It seems like our company is being asked more often than I can ever remember to provide music for the actual ceremony. This requires that you pay careful attention to details, both in advance and the day of the wedding. A lot of clients that call to inquire about our services are sold on my company, because we express a willingness to provide this service, and demonstrate that we have the experience necessary to ensure that things are done professionally. I have provided you with a step by step process for providing wedding ceremony music that is directly out of my company training manual. It has served us very well.Set up speakers where the sound will be projected in the area in which the wedding ceremony will take place.
Make contact with the Bride or Coordinator. If not already done, have the bride designate a person to contact you and give you the signal as to when the Processional is to start. If you are playing at a facility that regularly hosts weddings, the contact person may be the banquet hall manager.
For definition purposes, the Processional is the “here comes the bride” melody, and is played when the bride is coming down the aisle at the beginning of the ceremony. You should note that it is not uncommon for the bride to select some other song to play as the processional song.
The Recessional is the song used when the bride and groom come back down the aisle at the end of the ceremony.
You should pre-plan exactly what pieces of music to use for the processional and recessional PRIOR to the wedding day. However, unless otherwise specified, use the traditional wedding march processional and recessional. These can be found on most wedding music CDs, which are available in stores.
In most cases, you will have to take the place of a traditional organist. One-half hour prior to the wedding ceremony, start the “pre-ceremony” music. Sometimes the pre-ceremony music will consist of light classical music. Other times, popular wedding related love songs are used, such as The Wedding Song by Paul Stookey. The pre-ceremony music should be pre-planned with the client prior to the wedding.
Just prior to the actual processional, the bride may request a specific song to be played for the seating of the parents. This song is usually played five minutes prior to the starting of the ceremony. You should ask the person in charge to give you “the signal” when the parents are ready to be seated, and start this designated song when directed to do so.
There may be a specific song used for the processional for the bridesmaids, and then a separate song for just the bride and her escort (usually her father). Again, you must preplan all of this. Important!!! Make sure that you provide the bride with the time of the song used for the bridesmaids and/or bride to come down the aisle to!!! A short song may very well end before all of the attendants complete their entrance. This is especially true with larger wedding parties and you will have to take that into consideration!
Keep contact with the designated coordinator and start the processional when given the “go signal”.
When the Bride goes down the aisle and stops, you should gradually fade the processional out as she and her escort reach the awaiting groom and minister.
The bride may ask you to play a song or two during the ceremony and may even provide you with an instrumental tape to play for a live soloist to sing along with. It is important that you determine exactly when to start this song. Consult with the clergy prior to the ceremony to get specifics about when to play specific songs during the ceremony. A wedding “program”, if available, can be extremely helpful to use as a guide. Get the assistance of the person in charge to assist you with this. Playing a song, or a tape for a soloist during the ceremony is usually done at a very specific point of the ceremony, such as after a reading from the bible or a prayer. You must determine EXACTLY where you are to play the song or tape!!
Make sure that you know exactly when to start the recessional. In most instances, it will be obvious when the bride and groom kiss, and are presented by the minister as husband and wife. You should not start the song until you are certain that the bride and groom are coming down the aisle. It is important for you to have the recessional song cued up and ready to go at a moment’s notice. Again, consult with the clergy to determine when to begin the recessional.
Fade out the recessional after all bridal party members and parents/grandparents have come back down the aisle. Immediately go into background music, and proceed with the rest of the reception events as usual.
Popular Wedding Processional and
Recessional Pieces

1. Wedding March – Processional – Traditional

2. Wedding March – Recessional – Traditional

3. Cannon In “D”

4. Trumpet Voluntary

5. Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring

6. Trumpet Tune & Air

Bridal Trivia

Here’s a list of bridal questions you can use to ask the audience. I give the questions to the BG
in advance, and ask them to check off and answer the questions they consider to be appropriate.
As some are a little personal. And, to add any additional personal\family questions they like.General Questions:

Did the groom have a girlfriend when they first met?

Did the bride have a boyfriend when they first met?

Did someone introduce the bride & groom to each other?

What was the first movie they saw together?

What was their first address, if they lived together before getting married?

Questions regarding pets, pets names…

Questions regarding children’s names & birthdays from previous marriage

Questions regarding sibling’s names & birthdays

Questions regarding parent’s names, siblings & birthdays

Bride’s Birthday?

Groom’s Birthday?

Where did you first kiss?

What piece of furniture were you closest to when you first kissed?

What was the groom wearing when they first kissed?

What was the bride wearing when they first kissed?

What was the groom wearing for their first date?

What was the bride wearing for their first date?

Who wanted a long engagement?

Bride \ Groom \ Both \ Bride’s Parents \ Groom’s Parents \ All the above

Who wanted a short engagement?

Bride \ Groom \ Both \ Bride’s Parents \ Groom’s Parents \ All the above

What countries\states have the bride & groom visited together before

getting married?
Where are they going on their honey moon?

How long is their honeymoon going to be?

Who has a picture of the bride & groom (together), before they were married?

Who has a picture of the bride or groom, with an ex-boyfriend\ex-girlfriend?

The bride said yes I’ll marry you if _______________

The bride said yes I’ll marry you when ____________

The groom likes _____________ best about the bride

The bride likes _____________ best about the groom
True or False style questions:

Groom dated the bride’s sister first?

Groom knew the bride’s sister first?

Bride dated the groom’s brother first?

Bride knew the groom’s brother first?

Bride said No the first time the groom asked her for a date?

Bride said No the first time the groom asked her to marry him?

Bride asked the groom out first?

Groom had a mustache\beard when they first met?

Groom has never seen the bride in a bikini?

Groom asked the bride’s dad for permission to marry the bride?

Groom got down on one knee to propose?

Bride & Groom kissed underwater?

Bride & groom shared a room on their first trip?

The bride said let’s go to Las Vegas (to get married) instead?

The groom said let’s go to Las Vegas (to get married) instead?

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